Never really gave much thought to this saying before, but I guess after this week, I’ve been thinking a lot about it. Since I’ve probably kept most of you updated outside of this medium, I’m not going to go into details, except to say Isaiah had his first solid bowel movement today…2 of them!
I feel like a new mom excited about her child’s first steps or first words. Truth of the matter is that while Isaiah has successfully passed many of those firsts…every 3 months or so, I rejoice over him ‘getting the poo out’. Crazy I know…but that was the story of our lives. I think that’s why this week was even more difficult, because it’s been 6 years in the making. 6 years of complaining, 6 years of asking other moms ‘does this happen to you’, 6 years of spending minutes on end in the washroom with Sai coercing him to poo….6 years!
While I’m extremely grateful that we have a ‘plan’, I can’t help but kick myself for Sai’s predicament. I mean, I’ve always thought it was weird, not normal and downright wrong, but when I’d seek out advise from doctors, I heard ‘it’s normal, nothing to worry about…just watch his diet’. And I trusted, I listened and did as I was asked and still nothing worked. I feel badly because I think if I’d been more proactive about digging deeper, this week would not have happened. In short, I blame myself for all that happened because as a mom, I did not listen to my heart, my son or trust my intuition.
And from now on all that will change. I’ll probably become ‘that parent’ to all of the kids’ doctors…I’m no longer going sit by and take things at face value when it comes to the health of my family. I’ve heard too many horror stories about things that weren’t caught soon enough, not me…no sir…I will harass until I get my answers…they owe me that much, I pay a lot in taxes!
Hopefully this also marks once less conversation about Isaiah’s poo that any of you will ever hear from me again…trusting God for his full and complete healing and wisdom for us to do things in a manner which will be nothing short of beneficial to his health!
Oh T, I’m sorry you are blaming yourself, but I suppose it’s the learning of a lesson that matters most. Be that mom, you know the one, the mom who does whatever it takes to get answers for her kids.